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Being a Christian on NoFap and learning of the RedPill

Before you click off this post, just hear me out. This is coming from a guy who first discovered redpill in 2016 and didn't even believe it until 2019. That was when I had a couple of experiences and it pointed me right back to the redpill when I didn't think it would be valuable at all.
The Redpill has taught me a lot of things. NoFap has also taught me a lot of things.
Us as Christians already know some of the redpill, because we know that the Bible is true, the Holy Spirit is alive, Jesus is always with us. The Redpill is seeing the truth for what it is. Knowing the gospel is part of this, I believe.
But when it comes to women, 90% of guys will not take the redpill unless they have had an experience. It took me two experiences to wake up out of this bluepill society. And it all happened in 2019, but I'm still currently learning but also seeking God before I go out trying to date again. This is serious and real stuff.
I'm going to begin with the first experience. Prior to this experience I was still struggling with nofap, always binging because I was alone. I became comfortable with the fact that I would be lonely for a while after a breakup in 2017, so I spent 2018 binging like crazy and not caring. Spent the first couple of months of 2019 doing the same. Until I met this girl.
I didn't even have to chase her. She pursued me the whole time, making conversation everytime she saw me, then we ended up having a conversation about God. She could tell that I was a Christian through my energy. Even though I was secretly binging on PMO, I carried myself as a man of God to the best of my ability even though it was hard to stop PMO. She asked what church I went to and I told her, and she wanted to come so she gave me her number. This was last April. We texted for a couple weeks, she would go to my church and I started to begin to realize that she really liked me. She would give me hugs every time she saw me, and then one day a conversation struck about us liking each other.
She really liked me a lot, more than I could really ever know probably. She wrote me deep poems, and stuff like that. She gave me a kiss on the cheek when I saw her at my job one day in the parking lot. That's where we met. My job at the grocery store. Then we had a sexual conversation one day. It happened out of nowhere. Prior, I had told her that I wanted to wait till marriage to have sex, and she respected it. We still had a sexual conversation, and I never would've thought that she had this type of mentality at all. Because of how she carried herself in public and what not. About a month of us talking passed, and we ended up hanging out, playing a little video games, then she brought in the wine later. We didn't drink a whole lot, but it was my first time drinking so I got tipsy quick. The sum it up, we did do it. We didn't do a whole lot, but we did enough. It was sin regardless. We both felt bad, but I think she felt worse. And afterwards I was thinking that since we did it, we might as well just date and be a couple or whatever. She wouldn't let it happen. She felt we both weren't ready.
We hung out about 3 more times, including one time where she took me to the beach and we were out all day and then went back home and did it again. We knew we were wrong for it, and in the end we ended up agreeing to never see each other or talk again. I really didn't want to let go of her but she insisted.
After that chapter was over, I was still bluepill. So I was just wishing for that girlfriend who will love me and be with me. No later than a month passed, and I end up reconnecting with this girl from church who's family came back after about 7 or 8 years or more from going to church. The whole family struggled with believing in God, but the parents finally began to trust and believe God. But she didn't. She told me she did, but in the end I found out that she didn't. Her actions showed that she didn't, but I ignored them.
As ignorant as I was, knowing that we both liked each other and not acknowledging her past, I rushed into a relationship with her. I wanted her for her looks, I didn't care that she dressed provacatively in church or anything. I ignored everything about her baggage, her crazy past and her ex that was in jail. I just wanted a relationship with her and to make it work. That's all I wanted. And I made it known, through trying to impress her. Even though she told me she never been on a date before, but she wasn't a virgin at all. I ignored all these red flags. I would be an almost perfect gentleman to her, buying her flowers and stuff like that. A month in everything was going well until something happened.
She found out her ex was out of jail, but he was killed in a car crash. That's when I found out that he really wasn't her ex. She was really waiting on that moment for him to get out of jail and possibly take her back. But she wouldn't tell me that. Despite all that she told me about him cheating on her. Me being bluepill I ignored the fact that she was using our relationship as a way to try to stop thinking of him, but she was still wanting him. He treated her bad but she still wanted him. He was her imprint and I didn't understand this until it was all too late.
Once she found out about him, everything went 180 degrees. She was depressed over his death, and I didn't know what to do. She wasn't acting the same at all. I tried to be there for her but it didn't really help that much. Then I tried asking her best friend what I should do, and she got mad because I talked to her friend behind her back about the situation. Me being beta, I began to constantly apologize to her, begging for forgiveness. I invested to much of my attention to this short relationship and I didn't want to lose her at the time.
A week passed, and she said she wanted a break. Then she said it was best if we just stopped altogether, and I'm not gonna lie it left me devastated because she sold me a dream, and I believed that we would be long term. She sold me this dream that she would try and get closer to God and I immediately believed it. After all this, she told me that she didn't care about God, and that once she moved out of her parents house she was going to stop going. She always said that I wasn't a reckless enough for her, meaning I wasn't wild and bad like the guys of her past. Because I am a good person, who wouldn't break the rules. I was respectful, and she wasn't into that. It took for all that to happen just for her to admit all of this.
Now imagine if that tragedy didn't happen? It's terrible that it did happen. She told me things about him, like him being a gang leader and killing 3 people and stuff like that, but I can't judge him. We all sin. But if I feel like, as bad and as crazy as it sounds that God got me out of that relationship quick. Because I had no business in it. A week before he even died, I fell into a light sleep and had a vision of me driving downhill, and going into a huge roadblock sign, but before I hit it the dream stopped and I awoke. That very next week all that stuff happens. No coincidence.
I was relieved to know the truth. Because I could've been in that relationship for longer and it would've been bad. I would've stayed unaware and let her do stuff and ignore it.
After the break up I was disappointed, I wasn't deeply sad, I just felt rejected, lied to and robbed. A few weeks later, I decide to get more serious about nofap so I continue back watching nofap videos. This NoFap YouTuber, who is now my Forex mentor began redpill. He had seen the similar things that I saw. Women selling men a dream. Them saying things, and doing the exact opposite. He mentioned a redpill channel, and that's when EVERYTHING started to make sense. Everything.
I learned a whole lot, and everything in those videos explained both of my situations from 2019. As in the first situation, a woman can carry herself as a saint, but behind closed doors I saw a totally different person. And I'm not shaming her, we all know that the devil is working. I actually learned a lot from the first girl. In the end she knew she was wrong, that we were wrong. She actually helped me be more closer to God, more than I wanted to be. Back then I didn't even want to read the Bible or anything everyday like I do now. Both of these experiences lead me to closer to God because I want to know the truth and be who God has called me to be.
In conclusion, it isn't worth it guys. Don't let a woman sell you a dream, and don't ignore the red flags like I did. We have to put more trust in God more than anything.
The devil can tempt anyone, and it can be easy to just give in and sin, just like with PMO. Women are capable of entertaining other guys whether you committed to them or not. Or they committed. And at the end of the day we have no control over that. All we can really do is self improve, draw closer to God and go on about our lives. We can't become too attached to these females. Only stay attached to God, because he'll never turn your back on you.
The effect all of this has had on me eventually led me to read the word of God more, watch more sermons, meditate and pray more and also workout and eat better. And also not believe absolutely everything a person says to you. I hope you've got through this whole thing and this has helped you if you're going through something. Because this can apply to PMO as well. Those women on the screen don't care about you. They only care about your attention, whether it be your money, your click, or your double tap. Before we try to get into a long term relationship we have to seek God first. Because in this world today, a virtuous woman who is actually virtuous is hard to find. But God can lead us to the right path of what we need.
submitted by Camsnofapjourney to NoFapChristians [link] [comments]

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